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While I may love homeschooling, there are also numerous things I dislike about homeschooling! I am sharing a few of these today. Consider them before you begin homeschooling!
Our family has been homeschooling since 2010, and I will be the first to tell you how awesome homeschooling is. We LOVE it and plan on being in it for the long term. However, there are also many things I dislike about homeschooling, and while these things aren’t deal breakers, they do make me slightly jealous of my friends whose kids are in public school.
Here are 5 things I dislike about homeschooling!
The “S” word
I absolutely hate the socialization question. It is one that honestly makes me want to punch the person in the face who asks. In today’s world, where homeschooling is on the rise, and public schools are eliminating “socialization” opportunities, I am shocked that people even have the gall to ask how my kids will be socialized. Between co-ops, field trips, extra curricular activities, and other errands and events we rarely go a whole day at home. Homeschooling allows our kids to socialize with the real world. Not limited to kids segregated by age and grade. People need an education on the true meaning of socialization before they start responding to homeschoolers in a rude manner.
Paying for curriculum
The public school curriculum is free, homeschool curriculum is not. We have always been blessed with the funds or the curriculum when we need it, but I still dislike the cost and having to shell out the money. Going along with this is the lack of resources available if you have a child with special needs. I touched on this some in my homeschool pet peeves post.
NO free time
Ever! Our kids are with us all the time. When I do get a free moment, I normally have something I need to do. A homeschool moms job is 24/7. The only job that is truly ON all the time. No yellow bus to take the kids away. No break time. No adult conversation unless you’re at a co-op. Plus, when your kids are with you all the time, you end up being interrogated when your kids are with you during school hours (see #1).
Playing dual roles
Being mom and teacher is great sometimes, yet sometimes it’s not. Breaking out of teacher mode and back into mom mode is hard. At least for me. I feel like I am ALWAYS the bad guy. I mean where is the principal?! Plus, playing teacher, also means you get to be the one who grades ALL the papers and does all the planning. We also are required to play taxi driver, be a cook, a nurse, a housekeeper and doer of all the things. It’s exhausting, and sometimes we just need a break.
Falling in love with homeschooling
When I started homeschooling, I didn’t know how long we would be doing it. However, now that we have been doing it for 8 years, I have absolutely fallen in love with it. So, why is this on the dislike list? Because I know we are in it for the long haul, which means that I have 12 more years (EEK) of dealing with numbers 1-4! It also means I am left justifying our choice every day for the next 4,380 days. Unless by some miracle homeschooling truly goes mainstream and is an honored education choice by everyone. Not just the smart ones 😉
Do you homeschool? What would you add to this list?
That’s awful. We live in a small town and there are 6 homeschool families within a block of us so our kids are out all the time and I never thought about it.
Have you tried calling HSLDA to get their advice on going outside during school hours. They are the experts on the pros and cons of that.
It is SO hard to separate, but yes, I think sometimes we need to take the teacher hat off, and just be mom.
I agree, I don’t have two different roles. As a mom we teach all the time anyway.. as a homeschool mom, it’s just more of that. I have thought about it recently though and have wondered if I should separate the two roles more.
Sharon–
You don’t homeschool. So you have NO idea. Your kids are at school and you have time to clean, prep dinner, and have a cup of tea.
And FYI the “homeschoolers” you described sound like they are actually doing public school at home—- which is a very different from actual homeschooling.
Where in GA? WGHSA- West Georgia Homeschool Assiciation has one. We are in LaGrange, Pine Mountain, West Point, Hogansville, & part of East AL.
WGHSA.com
Thank you Sarah! You put my thoughts in words perfectly and I agree whole heartedly 🙂
There are several people making comments about public school not being “free”. You are correct, it is not free, however your missing the point. Everything associated with a public school, we, as homeschoolers participate in, we pay dollars towards this (if you or a spouse works), we pay clothing costs for our kids to wake up and get dressed, we pay daily food costs (though I personally would save a lot more money in this area if my kids went to school), we pay for materials used in our classroom, etc. The bloggers point is that as a homeschooler you pay for additional curriculum, yes it is a choice and yes, it can still be frustrating. This was incredibly frustrating when I sent my children to private school, some kind of tax credit would have been nice, since we didn’t utilize our public school system. I’m totally good with them not having to worry a lick about my kiddos education.
I know right? We should get an award for the self control 😉
I’m cracking up over “it makes me want to punch someone in the face.” HAHA! I feel the exact same way! Thank you for your honesty!
Totally agree! But, for some of us, it is hard to separate the two.
I struggle with your “mom” and “teacher” hat comment. I always see me as mom first and teacher second. I don’t have a hat that goes with either role. I’m their mom who teaches them. I’m not a teacher who happens to be mom.
Hi! I highly recommend finding a homeschool group! That is a great way for kids to find playmates, and moms to get a break for socialization themselves 🙂
Hi Sharon! You do realize that the point of this post was not to dis homeschooling right? I am a huge supporter of homeschooling, I was just sharing some things that maybe aren’t great about homeschooling.
As far as free time, you are correct. I get up at 5 am every day to work. Yes, blogging is work, and thankfully I love my job. However, during this time I am working. Rather it be for clients, checking emails, responding to comments, etc, it is part of my job. So, yes, you are correct. However, compared to families whose children go to public school, homeschooling families do NOT get that much free time. Homeschooling is a HUGE responsibility and it is a sacrifice we make. AND, if I’m honest sometimes it is not easy.
Yes, public school is paid for by our tax dollars. However, even if we homeschool, we are still paying for it! So, aren’t we then paying to educate our children twice? That is definitely something to dislike!
Can’t we as a community of homeschool moms admit that sometimes there are things we just don’t like about homeschooling? That doesn’t mean we are not commited. That doesn’t mean that we don’t love homeschooling, or our kids. It just means that not everything is perfect.
I hope you have a great day and I am so glad that there is nothing you dislike about homeschooling. Thank you for stopping by!
Public school education is not “free”. We pay for it in our property taxes, and we pay school fees. And we know homeschooling families who have gotten a computer to use at home and all curriculum materials for free…paid for by their public school district.
And I don’t really believe that you never get free time. If you’re able to blog on your computer, that’s free time. After the children go to bed there is free time. I realize being a stay at home parent is exhausting (I was one until my youngest children started school) and you may not have as much time as you like, but nobody is glued to their child(ren) 24/7. Sure you’re probably doing other things in that time, like laundry, dishes, etc…but so are all the parents who don’t homeschool.
I can’t imagine what it is going to be like to lose my free time. I have fibromyalgia and an only son who is on the autism spectrum and I think also gifted. He is in 5th grade and we are planning to homeschool him next year and at least through 8th grade. I won’t ever get a break. I have to be his playmate, therapist, friend, teacher and mom. That terrifies me. My sister and I played outside or inside together all day when we were at home, my mom rarely had to stop what she was doing to interact with us.
Great post! This was our first year homeschooling and not having any free time has been hard. Also paying for curriculum, especially as I was trying to figure out what worked for each kid at the beginning of the year!!
You might try Google for your state. That’s how I found out about the annual prom here in Austin, Texas.
I’m not sure. I know some homeschool groups are large enough to have them. The homeschoolers I know who have went to the prom were asked by local public school kids. Our group is not quite large enough to offer something like that yet.
About the Prom… Where are Prom’S held for HomeSchoolers? We are in Georgia.
I wouldn’t care what others thought. Let them out in public during the day. It is a way to explore and be creative. At the park you may see a bird or flower, take a photo, do research online and talk about it. An awesome way to do science.
Yes, 4H is a great option! My oldest sews and has zero interest in animals. She still enjoyed it!
Victoria – have you thought about 4-H? I grew up involved in it – and I didn’t even have to raise an animal! They have baking – sewing – all kinds of fun things. Just thought I would share that thought. If you have a YMCA near that’s a good option too.
Yes, I have heard the prom SO many times. The funny thing is that those who I know that have homeschooled through high school were still asked to the local public school prom….
Related to #1 – I am surprised at the number of times those of us homeschooling through high school are asked “what about the prom?” it’s hard to believe it’s a legitimate question, but people do ask it out of their concern that our high schoolers are being deprived of an absolutely essential experience. For the record, many homeschool groups do have proms, senior banquets, and dances, so those kids that do want those kinds of experiences can have them.
Related to #5 – now that the end of my homeschooling years is actually in sight, and since I am “in love” with homeschooling…. what will I do after the last one graduates?! o.O
It’s awful when that happens, but it is such a growing opportunity. It will get easier as you go on. Promise!! And it’s awesome that you have a support system going in. That is a huge help!
Good luck and thanks so much for stopping by!
Actually, I had been trying to do that. The only people we told were my parents and his parents (both sets of grandparents know people who were homeschooled as children and were supportive), and my best friend who is a teacher and helping me find fun activities :).
It’s kinda funny-just like your post said, I got attacked in a group setting (where you would think people would keep quiet to avoid a scene). My mom shared with my extended family at a Christmas party that we were going lanningn to homeschool and bam! Open season!
Hi Chelsea! I wrote a post about how to tell other you’re homeschooling. You can see that post here:
http://www.findingjoyinthejourney.net/tell-others-youre-homeschooling/
It is great that you already plan on homeschooling! Yet, I wouldn’t worry about sharing that news with everyone now. Enjoy a few years of NOT having to deal with the negative comments if you can.
What advise do you have for dealing with people’s comments? My daughter is 1 (year old not first grade, just 1 year old) and we are already getting attacked when people hear we are thinking of homeschooling.
I would have to say the thing I disliked most were all the stereotypes, usually based on lack of information. So many people thought that if we homeschool, we must be fundamental, skirt wearing, spelling bee winners. (Nothing against any of those things – just not us) Then there were some homeschoolers that held an equally bad stereotype about anyone and anything public school related. Even within my homeschool friends, there was sometimes an attitude that you’re not REALLY a good homeschooler unless you use this curriculum, style, etc. About fifteen years into it now, and I think all of those things are less prevalent now. The best question we ever got: Oh, you were homeschooled, are your parents religious or hippies?
It sounds like you have found a great balance!
I’ve been enjoying the best of both worlds. My daughter attends a Christian hybrid school where she attends a traditional class 2x/wk and is home with me 3. I love the “socialization” she gets at school and the freedom at home. I wish more schools would take on a program like this. The tuition is much more affordable.
That would be awful! We live in the country so we can go out as we please, but I think I would be more hesitant if I was in an urban area. I’m sorry!!
Oh yes, I look forward to a minute of peace and quiet. It’s surprising what can make us excited now a days!
Probably the biggest thing I struggle with is that I want so much to let my kids be outside during the day in nice weather… to do science or other school stuff…. but I can’t because somebody may see them out during school, assume we aren’t doing it “right” and report it… yes, this happens – just ask HSLDA… and the hassle of what it could lead to isn’t worth it… we would love to live in the country where there would be more freedom to make our own schedule…… for now, we will be thankful to homeschool and continue on. 🙂 I do sometimes let them sit on the deck in the backyard near the house and do math or something quiet… it is a real treat in spring or fall. 🙂
Oh that is so true! My daughter went to public preschool and the fundraisers alone were a huge expense! But, thanks for the reminder 🙂
Just to help you out a little bit… Public school is not free. We were just discussing this a few weeks ago at our home school group. You have to pay for the books and “supplies” for the classroom. Someone had to pay way over $100 for kindergarten. I’m sure there are some who qualify for getting it free, but it isn’t for very many. So… Next time remembering this might help for that number at least. 🙂
Absolutely!!
Oh yes, I am the least coolest homeschool mom around! I’d love to do the fun stuff, but my creativity is zero…
Oh that is sad! I’m in Ohio and up until this past year homeschoolers could onlyplay until Jr. High and after that it was up to the coaches discretion. THere was a law that just passed though allowing homeschoolers to play through high school. Hopefullysomething like that passes where you are soon!
Thank you! And yes, the benefits totally out weigh the negative…. but don’t you wish we could have the best of “both”?
This was fabulous!
I sometimes wish I could have the “time” to myself that school would give me but the benefits of homeschooling far outweigh the “negative”.
I love your number 5! Awesome.
Thanks for sharing.
xoxo
I loved number 5 on the list…lol
Thanks for the post – we are in our 3rd year of homeschooling Middle and High School. The one challenge we have is sports and enough activities for girls. Part of that is due to the fact we live in a very rural county. However, here they are not allowed to try out for the public school teams, so we try to get them to the travel teams etc… While it is a challenge we plan to stay in for the long haul. We love it too and it just fits our family.
I would add, not being able to do every single cool thing that would be neat/interesting/educational with your kids. This is year 17 for us, and over the years, there have been so many things that I would LIKE to be able to buy to do with the kids, kits, experiments, building supplies, crafts, tickets to events, etc. We do a lot–but there will always be MORE out there, and things we can’t do.
When your kids get into high school it’s the “opportunities” word. “How can you keep the kids at home and limit their opportunities?” Well, I’m also limiting their opportunities to purchase drugs, be involved in sexual relationships, hear profanity all day every day, etc. 🙂
Oh, Toni believe me you can totally tell those who have a legitimate question vs. those who are just being judgemental. I have NO problem at all talking to people who are sincere. But, the judgement and interrogations you get from others….well those are the ones you want to punch. Believe me though, I have never actually done it 😉
Don’t be so hard on those of us who don’t homeschool and may not understand the socialization question. Use it as an opportunity to educate – you might peak someone’s interest. As I have no experience with homeschooling I might ask that question and I hope someone wouldn’t want to punch me (LOL) for legitimately being curious. A little grace might be in order for those who come off a bit aggressive – they don’t know. Be patient. Even though on the rise, it’s still foreign to a whole lot of people.